On Saturday mornings at 6:00 am, while the sensible person lies asleep in bed, I join a group of guys at the local Panera Bread to discuss theology.  During this season, we’re going through a course by John Harrington called “Biblical Theology of Mission.”  We’re discussing the purpose of the kingdom of God, His eternal purpose, and how history is driving towards that goal.  This week, we began with a passage from the book of Genesis, chapter 3:

“I [God] will put enmity between you [Satan] and the woman, and between your offspring and her offspring;
he shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise his heel.” – Genesis 3:15, ESV

As we talked about this passage, I was struck with the immensity of the goodness of God.  When disaster strikes on a major scale, for example, Hurricane Katrina or the bombing of the World Trade Center, we always hear news reporters interview spiritual leaders asking the question, “How could a good God allow such a horrible thing happen?”  Most of the world approaches God with an attitude of bitter contempt.  He is viewed as the instigator and sustainer of suffering and unfairness.  ”If you would just get out of the picture,” they effectually say to God, “we could just figure things out on our own.”  In Genesis, however, there is a different story that has the power to open your heart to the extravagant kindness of God.

The Covenant Made

God’s interactions with mankind is built on the concept of “covenant.”  Historically speaking, a covenant was a lifelong, binding agreement between two parties.  If both parties upheld their end of the covenant, there were certain blessings to enjoy.  If, however, one party did not follow the contract, there were significant consequences (curses).  After creation, God made a covenant with the first man (i.e. Adam) that resulted in two important things: rulership over all creation and uninterrupted intimacy with God.  These blessings were dependent on one thing alone, Adam and Eve were not to eat the fruit from this tree called the “tree of the knowledge of good and evil” (Gen. 1:17).

The Covenant Broken

We all know what happened next.  Adam and Eve ate from the tree, which led to a break in the covenant.  As a result, the blessings they experienced (i.e. rulership over creation and intimacy with God) turned into curses.  Curse one: Man’s sovereignty over Creation was transferred to Satan and, in so doing, mankind became slaves.  Curse two: the kind of intimacy that man had, the walking-with-God-through-the-garden closeness, was ripped from them by sin.  Man was sentenced to walk through the world alone, servant to a sadistic and twisted master and feeling the distance from God that many still feel today.

The Covenant Restored

In Genesis 3, God is standing in front of Adam and Eve in the garden, while Satan (in the form of a serpent) slithers around their feet.  The covenant has been broken, the couple is guilty, and there are no words spoken to their defense.  Behold, however, the unearthly goodness of God in this scenario.  God knows that there is no way that the covenant can be restored by Adam and Eve.  Even if He did call a mulligan, they would probably make the same mistake again.  But wait, God pulls a rabbit out of His hat that no one expected.  He promises the woman that one day one of her offspring with crush Satan and restore the covenant.  What she didn’t understand, and neither did Satan, was that this was not going to be any ordinary person; this One, this Seed, was going to come from God Himself – Messiah Jesus.  He would be 100% God and 100% Man.  He would relate to both parties.  He would mediate between the two groups.  The Apostle Paul reflected on this after the fact:

“But in the fullness of time, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons” (Gal. 4:4,5 ESV).

In effect, God sent His Son Jesus to uphold our side of the covenant between Him and us.  When Adam and Eve broke the covenant, God could have legitimately walked away from us, leaving us without hope or restoration.  However, He didn’t!  In this situation, God chose not to be fair.  Fairness would have dictated an irrevocable sentence of death and separation.  Instead, God chose to be extravagantly generous, by restoring the covenant in such a way that it could never be broken again.  Jesus’ death and resurrection re-sealed the covenant that God made with Adam.  No longer were God and mankind seated on opposite ends of the table with no mediator in between.  Jesus walked in and sat down on both sides of the table.  And the beauty of this arrangement is that Jesus will always agree with Jesus!

This was an event that rippled both ways through the fabric of time, permanently sealing mankind’s dominion over the earth and the opportunity for unbroken intimacy with God through the God-Man (100% God, 100% Man), Messiah Jesus.  That is one reason why He will return one day to set up a tangible kingdom upon the Earth, but that’s for another blog post.

So the next time someone tells you that God isn’t fair, you tell them:

“You know what?  You’re absolutely right!  Let me tell you what He is…”

“Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” – Matthew 28:19-20

“Do you like blackcurrant martinis?  I can also make mango.”  Dennis stood in his kitchen with a bottle of triple sec in his hand, a martini shaker in the other, and–yes–a bottle of Vodka sitting on the counter.  Honestly, the question had taken me by surprise; not because of the offer of alcohol, but because of the context in which it was asked.  Dennis had just been baptized.

Would we?  Could we?  The unexpected merger of things I once considered sacred and secular was taking place before my eyes.  What surprised me more than this head-on collision was my response that came out so naturally that it caught me off-guard.

“Yeah, we’d love some – uh – martinis.  Make ‘em blackcurrant!  Thanks, man.”

My Friend, Dennis

Rewind.

Last summer, was a season of change.  I had changed jobs, our home was up for sale, and we were thinking about pursuing organic church life, outside the walls of what both of us were familiar.  It was during this transitional time Father brought Dennis across my path.

We are both contact center engineers.  Cisco phone equipment is our specialty.  We are the “Thank-you-for-calling-press-one-to-speak-to-a-representative”-kind of guys.

I had known Dennis from a previous job.  He is a black-and-white kind of guy, straight-to-the-point.  His colorful life has taken him on many adventures.  Studying music at Berkeley and rubbing shoulders with biker gangs are a few of his intriguing tales.

During my first months at this new job, my friendship with Dennis had deepened.  Something I found interesting about him was his unfamiliarity with the cliches and practices found in the Christian sub-culture.

When we talked about God, I was forced to speak in everyday language, kindly avoiding phrases like “washed in the blood” and “asking Jesus into you heart.”

It was not too long before Dennis had accepted Jesus as his Savior.  He had read a small Gospel of John and responded to the gospel message on page three.  The words had led him to Jesus during a difficult season of his life.

Waiting for the Fruit to Ripen

As soon as he came to Jesus, my Type-A personality took over.  Several times a week, I would encourage him to get baptized.  “How about this weekend?” I would ask.  “We can come to your place.  You can come to ours.”

Whether it was my relentless salesmanship or the busyness of his life – I’m not sure – Dennis was not ready to be baptized.  I was disappointed.  I had been reading about organic church life, keeping things simple and getting back to the New Testament.  I wanted to be like Philip, finding people along the road, getting them saved, and then baptizing them.  Move over Mr. Ford and the assembly line!

Yet, despite my best efforts to cast him as the Ethiopian steward (Acts and immediately baptize him in the river off of Highway 494, Dennis showed me that he had a mind of his own.  He would respond only when he was ready (if ever).

During these times, I would pour out my frustration to Father.  I respected Dennis and valued our friendship, but I wanted to see results.  I was impatient.  My wife, reading me like a book, smiled and said, “You know what I think?”

“What?”

“You can probably guess what I’ll say.”

“Oh no, not the quote…” I begged.

You must understand, my wife is very proud of the following quote.  A friend of hers at Bible school authored it.  Ever since, it has become one of her mantras that – I admit – has great depth and wisdom.

“Remember what my friend Lindsay always says, ‘Ripe fruit yields to gentle pressure.’”  Elisa let out a little smirk, proud of identifying another opportune moment to evoke the mantra.

Those words resounded in my spirit.  I knew she was right.  If Dennis was ever to be baptized it needed to be based on his own decision, not out of obligation or compulsion.  When the fruit was ripe, it would give in.  Until then, all my pressuring would be bruising fruit that was not yet ripe.

I resolved that I would no longer bring up the issue of baptism.  I would wait for Dennis to ask me about it.

It was immaturity on my part, you see, to expect Dennis to respond in cookie-cutter fashion to the descriptions we read of in the Book of Acts.  Living organic Christianity cannot be done like one bakes a recipe.  You can’t just add flour, salt, and butter and then bake for 45 minutes.

The call to organic life is a call into relationship. It is a call to willingly walk alongside others at the pace they’re comfortable with. It values slow progress with fellowship over blazing a trail in solitary seclusion.

A Day of Celebration

Two weeks ago, nearly six months after he accepted Jesus as his Savior, Dennis brought up the idea of getting baptized.  We were standing outside as he took a smoke break, bundled up in the tundra-like winter of Minnesota, when he said to me, “Ya, man, I think I’m ready to get baptized – maybe next weekend.”

He explained how some difficult issues had recently surfaced and he realized that he needed to solidify his commitment to the Lord and have a fresh start.

That following Friday, my wife and I arrived at his apartment complex, full of excitement about how God had been working in Dennis’ life.  We briefly talked about the meaning of baptism, identifying with the death and resurrection of Jesus.  Dennis full excited and said, “Yah man, new life, everything’s done with, starting over!  I’m ready!”

He was most certainly ready.  No one had coerced him.  He wasn’t doing it to earn God’s favor.  He was responding in obedience because the Holy Spirit had moved on his heart.  The fruit had ripened and was responding to the pressure of the Spirit. He was hearing the voice of God for himself!

We took him down to the apartment pool and baptized him.  Coming up out of the water, this 49-year-old man looked like a kid again.  His eyes were full of life and he said, “Woh, man, I’ve got goosebumps all over and I never get those.  This never happens to me!”

Alcohol and Jesus

We dried off and went upstair to celebrate.  Dennis offered us martinis and thought to myself, “What the heck?  This is a great reason to celebrate!”

We drank those martinis with gladness as we prayed and talked about our life in Christ.  It was natural, free-flowing, and completely organic.  It was the culmination of a hands-off, Spirit-led journey about waiting on God for fruit to ripen.

There was no guilt or awkwardness about merging Jesus with alcohol.  Instead of bringing Dennis into a rigid system of rules and behavioral norms, the good news of Jesus had been injected right into his living room.  The message of salvation and freedom had, just as it had two thousand years ago, become incarnational.  The living Word had “become flesh” and walked into a cocktail party.

This journey into organic Christianity is more exciting and unpredictable than I ever imagined.  But the beauty is in the simplicity.  Love one another without any strings attached and watch the Father ripen the harvestfields.

Given the present state of our global economy, one must consider how these shakings will affect the Body of Christ.  The church in America has been known for its power and influence, largely due to the financial base that they have access to.  In times where jobs are scarce and tax-exempt charitable giving are dwindling, what will the impact be to the institutional church?

“A new study from the Barna Group found that during the past three months, one out of every five households had cut its faith-based giving. As a result, churches could see donations decline by as much as $5 billion and revenue by as much as 6 percent during the fourth quarter of the year. “The enemy of charitable giving is insecurity,” said Paul G. Schervish, professor of sociology and director of the Center on Wealth and Philanthropy at Boston College. “Right now, we can’t even project the end of the recession, like we did other recessions.”

“The number of religious groups in trouble is growing. Focus on the Family, a faith-based organization in Colorado with a $5 million deficit, laid off more than two hundred workers in November, while Seventh Day Adventist Church leaders have instituted a wage freeze and a 20 percent reduction in travel. Elsewhere, falling donations recently forced the Catholic Diocese of Pittsburgh to hold a “special collection” for Catholic Charities in response to a 40 percent increase in calls to the agency’s emergency assistance program.”

“During the last year, most churches have reported 5 percent to 10 percent reductions in giving. I’m also aware of some churches that are experiencing up to a 20 percent reduction from last year’s collections. Because we have not seen such a drop in general giving in recent decades, this loss of revenue has caught many churches by surprise.

“I also believe that what goes on in them [support groups] is far closer to what Christ meant his Church to be, and what it originally was, than much of what goes on in most churches I know. These groups have no
buildings or official leadership or money. They have no rummage sales, no altar guilds, no every-member canvases. They have no preachers, no choirs, no liturgy, no real estate. They have no creeds. They have no program. They make you wonder if the best thing that could happen to many a church might not be to have its building burned down and to lose all its money. Then all the people would have left is God and each other.”

For the past few weeks, I’ve been stuck on a passage in the Gospel of John.

“Therefore Jesus answered and was saying to them, ‘Truly, truly, I say to you, the Son can do nothing of Himself, unless it is something He sees the Father doing; for whatever the Father does, these things the Son also does in like manner.’” — John 5:19

The implications of this statement are far-reaching.  Jesus did nothing unless he first saw Father doing it.  Think about it.  Jesus comes to the pool of Bethesda, a place filled with the sick and dying.  Everyone is waiting for their own personal miracle.  This Jewish man steps foot into a sea of need and interacts with only one lame man.

“Do you want to get better?” he asks him.  Notice, this is an exclusive offer for only one.  The rest of the crowd is waiting, watching, hoping that Jesus will come to them and repeat the same scenario.  However, the time never comes.  The lame man is healed and a few verses later we see that Jesus is no longer at the Pool of Bethesda; he’s in the Temple.

Why didn’t he heal the rest of the people?  That is the wrong question to ask. We begin with our assessment of the situation.  We start with the crowd of people and consider that factor to be the most significant.

Let’s review what Jesus said to the Jews shortly after healing the lame man: “The Son can do nothing of Himself, unless it is something He sees the Father doing…”

Jesus based every action on what Father was doing.  His “ministry model” was simple and relational.  The needs of the crowd were secondary to Jesus’ need to see what on the heart of Father.

Question: What do you think of this approach to ministry?  How do we position ourselves to see what Father is doing?

For the past few weeks, my wife and I have been reading portions of Acts and Paul’s letter to the churches of Galatia.  During our reading, I’ve savored the freedom that we have in Jesus.  We can live a life free from a works mentality, released to simply come to God through faith.

I’ve also thought a lot about the institutionalized structure of modern-day Christianity.  As I continue on this journey in organic Christianity, I’m beginning to believe that the inorganic structure, made up of external rules and expectations, can cripple the Body of Christ.  In some ways, it appears to present, in Paul’s words, “a different gospel,” that delivers an inaccurate view of salvation and our relationship with God.

In Acts and Galatians, there are striking parallels between the state of modern-day Christianity and the early church.

A Different Gospel

Paul had recently returned from Galatia (located in modern-day Turkey) only to receive word that there was serious trouble among the new believers.  A group of Jewish men, called Judaizers, had entered the churches and begun teaching that the non-Jewish believers had to keep the Mosaic law in order to find approval from God.  Most notable, was the strict stance on male circumcision (ouch!).  To the Jews of that time, circumcision was a mark of superiority that proved (or so they thought) that they had a preferential relationship with God.

This contradicted to the message entrusted to Paul, which was based on faith in the completed work of Jesus Christ.  To Paul, there was no amount of good works that can gain favor with God.  Everyone stands absolutely condemned and incapable of “posting bail” on the account of “good behavior.”

“But the Scripture has shut up everyone under sin, so that the promise by faith in Jesus Christ might be given to those who believe.” – Galatians 5:22

To Paul, the Mosaic law served as a light to reveal the wickedness of the human heart.  It was never designed to be a code to follow.  By revealing the sin within our hearts, the Law shows us that we cannot measure up to God by our own good deeds.  Recognizing this shortfall, should be the first step in following Jesus.

The Jerusalem Council

The Galatians were receiving a counterfeit gospel that was enslaving them to external actions and lifeless ritual.  Paul was enraged, rising up like a father to their defense. He quickly went down to Jerusalem, the epicenter of Christianity, to talk with the believers there.

He brought his case before the entire church in Jerusalem.  To Paul, this was not an issue for some hierarchical elite; this was a disease that threatened to attack every member of the Body of Christ.  In response to that meeting, known as the Jerusalem Council, the entire church crafted a message to send out through the Roman world.  It was an memo of clarification for all the new believers scattered across the empire.

“Then it seemed good to the apostles and the elders, with the whole church, to choose men from among them to send to Antioch with Paul and Barnabas–Judas called Barsabbas, and Silas, leading men among the brethren…

“For it seemed good to the Holy Spirit and to us to lay upon you no greater burden than these essentials: that you abstain from things sacrificed to idols and from blood and from things strangled and from fornication; if you keep yourselves free from such things, you will do well. Farewell.” (Acts 15:22, 28-29)

To summarize, the only burden the apostles placed upon the non-Jewish believers was to avoid the following:

1. Meat sacrificed to idols
2. Blood from animals
3. Meat from animals that have been strangled
4. Sexual immorality

Preserving Unity

The first three commandments were made for the sake of the Jewish believers.  In their culture, sacrificial meat, blood, and strangled meat were strictly taboo.  It was unfamiliar to them.  If a gathering of non-Jewish believers served blood-sausage for dinner, the ethnically Jewish believers would not want to come.  Though the food was a non-issue to the Gentiles, it was a serious stumbling block for the Jews.  These first three commands were given for the sake of unity.  By serving “safe food,” Jewish brothers and sisters could join in gatherings without hesitation.

Let me paint a modern example.  You have just been invited to someone’s house for dinner on Friday night.  They are believers and you, being hungry for fellowship with other Christians, have been thinking about it all week.  The host family is from the Phillipines, a precious elderly couple.  The day before you arrive, however, you are told by a friend what kind of meal they served last week:

“They were serving soup that night.  I was excited because there’s nothing like a warm cup of soup on a cold Minnesota night.  Little did I know what was coming.  I asked them what kind of soup it was and they told me, ‘A Phillipino special: Soup No. 5.’  What’s in it, I asked?  They replied, ‘It’s a savory soup with bull’s rectum and testicles.  We also have coconut grubs and Betute Tugak, which is stuffed frog.’”

You feel your lunch begin traveling up your through in the wrong direction.  You gulp and exclaim: “Bull’s rectum and testicles, coconut grubs, and stuffed frog?  Ahh!!  I’m not going to go over there ever!!”

Get the picture?  The taboo food became a stumbling block for the non-Phillipino brother.  Something as simple as dinner prevented unity.  (Note: Although I’ve never eaten the aforementioned items, I can say that the Phillipino food that my wife’s aunt makes is incredible.)

The last command they give concerns sexual immorality (i.e. fornication).  When most people read this they falsely assume this means sexual intercourse outside of marriage.  Both Jew and Gentile believers understood that the concept that sex was a gift to be exercised only within the covenant of marriage.

Instead, they were directing these Gentiles living in such close fellowship with the Jewish believers to observe the specific marriage regulations required by Leviticus 18, which prohibited marriages between most family relations. This was something that Jews would abhor, but most Gentiles would think little of.

Gentile Christians had the “right” to eat meat sacrificed to idols, to continue their marriage practices, and to eat food without a kosher bleeding, because these were aspects of the Mosaic law they definitely were not under. However, they are encouraged (demanded?) to law down their “rights” in these matters as a display of love to their Jewish brethren.

All four of the requested abstentions related to ceremonial laws laid down in Leviticus 17 and 18, and three of them concerned dietary matters which could inhibit Jewish-Gentile common meals.

No Greater Burden

When the  question regarding church practice was brought up, there were only four requests that the Jerusalem church laid upon the Gentile believers.  Of all the issues they could have addressed, they chose four that touched on diet and relationships.  There was no mention of consistent tithing, church attendance, church membership, appropriate “spiritual covering,” or signed statements of faith.

Yet, in spite of this clear scriptural truth, we can add additional requirements in an attempt to validate one’s relationship with God.

I think we would have more people walking in freedom and wholeheartedness if we kept the main thing, namely, Jesus Christ, the main thing.  Let the pure and unadulterated simplicty of following Jesus be the only requirement for being a “Christian.”  Let’s not load extra burdens on people needlessly.

May the Lord help me to add “no greater burden” to those He brings into my life.

I must confess my love for movies–high-quality ones that make you think. When The Matrix came out in the theaters, I was in awe. The special effects were cutting edge for its time and the plot was enveloping. In the movie, Keanu Reaves plays Thomas A. Anderson, a computer programmer by day and elusive computer hacker by night. Operating under the online alias of “Neo,” Mr. Anderson is in the pursuit of the “The Matrix,” a science-fiction-like conspiracy theory. He’s convinced that it’s out there. He just hasn’t found it yet.

Through a series of extraordinary events, Neo finds himself at the top of an abandoned building with a mysterious man named Morpheus. He offers the inquisitive young man the opportunity to know the truth. However, the truth comes at a significant price. Here is the transcript of the offer Morpheus made to Neo:

Morpheus: This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back…You take the blue pill, the story ends. You wake up and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland and I show you just how deep the rabbit hole goes.

Neo pauses for an instant, then reaches for the red pill. He swallows it down with a glass of water, and looks at Morpheus.

Morpheus: Remember, all I’m offering you is the truth: nothing more.

I felt a little like Neo when I opened up Pagan Christianity by Frank Viola and George Barna. Needless to say, I took the red pill and began my journey down the rabbit hole.

Down the Rabbit Hole

The first thing I discovered through my reading was that the early Christians functioned in ways that were radically different from what is commonly referred to as “church” today. For the first 300 years, life in Christ was a corporate reality that came naturally and flowed out of the home, embracing family and relationships.  Believers met in each other’s homes, sharing their experiences over a meal. There were no church buildings or meeting halls. From the very beginning, Christian community was expressed in the most simple and natural of places—the home.

When they gathered, there was no predetermined order of service. They saw themselves as a family. As such, the gatherings were unscripted and spontaneous. When each person arrived, they understood that it was not only their right, but also their responsibility to contribute to the gathering. We see this explained in 1 Corinthians 14:26: “When you assemble, each one has a psalm, has a teaching, has a revelation, has a tongue, has an interpretation.” In that time, every person was a minister in the practical sense of the word. Their gatherings had active participants, not passive spectators.

Church structure also looked different. In today’s “church” model, the pastor presides over the people of God. He is the one who blesses civic events, marries the young, buries the old, represents the group to the outside world, and exercises spiritual authority over them. Essentially, the modern-day pastor is the functioning “head” of the church. This concept would have been foreign to the early Christians.

For the first three centuries, there is no evidence of a hierarchical, top-down, chain-of-command. They understood that the Body of Christ has only one “head,” which is Christ Jesus Himself. Therefore, He occupied much more than an honorific role in church leadership. He was the Source of all guidance and direction. Each member of the Body had direct access to the Head. Therefore, questions such as “Who is your spiritual authority?” or “Who is your covering?” would be simple for the ancient believers. Without question, they would say, “That’s easy. It’s Jesus Christ.”

Shocking Implications

Looking at the difference between the early Church and today’s institutionalized expression made me feel sorrowful.  In the early days, each believer was given opportunity to express their revelation of Christ in the gatherings.  Songs, hymns, spiritual songs, teachings, revelations, tongues, interpretations–a beautiful tapestry was woven in the simplicity of their fellowship.  Each member, freely functioning under the headship of Christ, expressed His beauty and presence in a remarkable way.

In contrast, the format of institutional church services today seem to  inhibit the expression of non-”professional” people of God.  Although my wife and I were given great freedom to express our gifts, it seemed like the majority of people in the congregation were passive observers.  Countless Sundays went by where the traditional structure kept them from expressing their revelation of Jesus.  I think back to the times when I felt that I had nothing to preach on a certain Sunday morning.  Many times, I would struggle to not enter a place of striving just to produce something acceptable to give the people.  It was, of course, my “responsibility” to feed them–or so I had been taught.  Thinking back, I am convinced that there were times when God would have desired to reveal Himself through those silent saints who lacked the freedom to share their revelation of Christ.

Who is to blame for this tragic imprisonment of the people of God? That’s a difficult question to answer and it’s not my responsibility to judge that case.  Most professional ministers I have met have an authentic love for the people of God and want the people in their congregation to grow up into maturity.  I know that is true for the leaders of the church I was part of–they are authentic and well-intentioned.

Perhaps the only statement that can be made about this issue is that we are a product of the paradigm we’ve been raised in.  When all you know of “church” is filtered through the tradition of the previous generation, the way it’s supposedly “always been,” it’s difficult to consider something else.

As my wife and I considered the implications of the way the institution operates, for conscience sake, we decided that we could no longer be a part of it.  While God may not be calling every pastor to leave their role at this time, there was no question as to what our reponse should be.

Powerless and Vulnerable

Over the next few days, we begged the Father for wisdom.  Our hearts were grieved as we considered the possibility of leaving.  Relationships would be tested in the fire of obedience.  There was much opportunity to misunderstood.  Feelings would likely be hurt though we desperately wanted it to not be so.  In the wisdom of God, we had been led into a situation that we had absolutely no control over.  We found ourselves powerless and vulnerable.

We called the senior pastors and asked if they could come over for coffee on Saturday.  They cheerfully agreed. having no idea what was to come.  “Can we bring anything?” they asked.  “A ton of grace and some patience,” I thought to myself. With a mixture of resolve and anxiety, I looked into my wife’s beautiful emerald eyes.  They were calming and made me momentarily forget about the meeting.  “Can we fast forward a few months?” my wife asked with a smile.  “Sadly, no, Elisa.  We’re gonna’ have to walk through this valley together.”

There’s something ironic about short words with deep meaning.  Take the word “prayer” for example.  There are only six letters in the word, but it is used to describe interacting with the limitless God.  Seems ironic, doesn’t it?  If I was in charge of creating a word to describe prayer, I’d probably end up forming a long, German-looking word with multiple hyphens in it.  I’d probably make it nice and complicated, just so that everyone realized the immensity of what they were getting involved in.

Condemnation and Shame

It seems that prayer is a word that Christians speak and write a lot about, but actually do very little.  At least, that statement has been true of my own life.  I’ve spoken on the importance and ease of prayer, but struggled to daily interact with the Lord.  In fact, if I’m going to be downright honest, I haven’t especially enjoyed prayer.  Sure, there were times when the Spirit would intervene and I would experience some delight, but for the most part the place of prayer has been a dry and arid region of my life.

Condemnation and shame (i.e. thinking I am something wrong) have contributed to my hesitancy to engage God in the place of prayer.  Whenever I would struggle to stay on the right path, I would sense a wave of condemnation and shame.  I’d suppose that God was disappointed in my poor performance. Why wouldn’t He?  He died for my sins and to free me from this horrible cycle of unrighteousness and I repay Him with endless mistakes.  I think many people identify with this way of thinking.  It’s the way I used to think until I read, The Shack, by W. Paul Young.

God Is Never Disappointed

In The Shack, there’s a conversation that takes place between Mackenzie, the main character, and Holy Spirit.  During the conversation, Holy Spirit makes a statement like, “You know it’s not possible for me to ever be disappointed in you, Mack.”

Mack responds with astonishment and unbelief.  “Surely, it’s not possible that You’ve never been disappointed in me.”

Holy Spirit then launches into this beautiful discourse on how it is not possible for God to be disappointed in us.  The logic goes something like this:

• Disappointment is results from unmet expectations.  For example, I expected you to clean up the house by the time I got home, but you didn’t. Therefore, my expectation is not met.  Therefore, I feel disappointed because you did not meet my expectation.
• Expectation is the “strong belief something will happen or be the case in the future.”  Notice, it is not the knowledge that something will happen in the future.  It is the “strong belief.”  Therefore, expectations are only possible for beings that do not know the future.
• God knows the future.  He is the “Alpha and Omega, the Beginning and the End.”  David said in Psalm 139 that before a word was even on his lips God already knew it.
• Therefore, since God knows everything He cannot have unmet expectations; and if God cannot have unmet expectations then He cannot experience disappointment towards me when I sin.

It may take a minute to wrap your mind around this logic, but it will liberate you once you understand.  God knew me, and loved me, before I was even born.  When I was chosen in His before the foundations of the world (Eph 1:4), He already knew the list of sins I would commit.  However, in spite of that, He still chose to love me and make me His own.  Therefore, there is never any reason for me to live under condemnation (Rom 12:1).

Talking to Dad

The next day, I went for a walk during my lunch break.  I like to walk in the middle of winter because I can be outdoors and by absolutely alone at the same time.  No one else is as crazy as I am to go for a walk when it’s 10 degrees F outside!

As I was walking down the road, I found myself praying and, oddly enough, enjoying the experience.  This was unexpected.  As I began to think about what I read the night before, Holy Spirit showed me how He used the story to break off shame and condemnation from me.  I no longer had to live under the cruel taskmaster of disappointment.   As Paul told the Ephesians I had been, “freely accepted in the Beloved,” (Ephesians 1:6) which is Christ.  No matter what state of being I am in, I can run to Him and find full acceptance.

Up until then, I had always called God my “Heavenly Father.”  As I prayed, I felt the need to ask God for another name to call Him.  “I associate all these feelings of disappointment and condemnation with that title, God.  Is there another name I can call You?”

I began to try out other words that mean “Father.”

“Let’s see…Abba…no…Papi….no….hmm.”  I couldn’t figure something out.

Then Holy Spirit spoke to me and asked, “What do you call your father?”

“Dad,” I replied.  “I just call him my dad.”

“Then that is what you can call Me,” He said within.

Truly?  Could I dare to call God such a name that was common and plain?  “Yes,” I said to myself.  “That is exactly what I will call you!”

The experience was so freeing to me.  I did not have to live under the false idea that God was disappointed in me.  Neither did I need to speak to Him as if He were far off.  He is the One who has come near to me even when I was far away from Him.  I am freely accepted by my “Dad.”  I can encounter someone called “Dad.”  That is something that I can relate to.

Such a small word to convey such a limitless God.  There’s that irony again.

Riding home from church as a child was always a colorful experience. The morning had been full of activity: singing songs, playing games, and Bible stories on the flannel-type storyboard complete with cutouts of Jesus and his disciples. There was a lot of stimulation and I needed some way to release all these experiences pent up inside. So what would I do? On the twenty-minute drive home from church, I would dominate the conversation, recounting every detail of the morning. My brother, eight years older and interested in things other than a six-year-old’s rendition of Jonah and the Whale, would get frustrated and complain saying, “Mom, Matthew just won’t stop talking!”

I admit it. I like to talk.

If anyone could have a sense of accomplishment it would have been me. Already in my mid-twenties, I was the associate pastor of a small church plant. I had the opportunity to share the pulpit with the senior pastor, lead small groups, and coordinate outreaches to the community. I had a laminated card certifying my position and a monthly stipend for my car. I had crossed the gap between laymen and clergy. I was one of the professionals. Young, yes, but full of zeal and on the track towards someday being the pastor of my very own church.

Is There Something More?

“Let me tell you why you’re here. You’re here because you know something. What you know you can’t explain, but you feel it. You’ve felt it your entire life, that there’s something wrong with the world. You don’t know what it is, but it’s there, like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad. It is this feeling that has brought you to me. Do you know what I’m talking about?” – Morpheus, The Matrix

However, there was something gnawing at my foundation, like a “splinter in my mind” or a popcorn kernel stuck between my teeth. It was going no where. No matter how hard I tried to be dedicated and involved in the church, there was something inside of me that would not be ignored. My wife and I would go for walks through the forest and share our hearts with one another. So many times on those walks we’d end up looking at each other and, with an aching and unfulfilled desire in our hearts, saying, “Isn’t there something more?”

The church provided plenty of activities to keep us busy.  However, the longing was for more than programs, meetings, and recognition.  We craved the same life that believers shared with one another in the Book of Acts.  We wanted to see unbelievers get saved and lives transformed.  The Christian life had to be more than what we were experiencing.  Jesus died for so much more than repetitious, organized meetings and relationships that seemed superficial and forced.

Please don’t misunderstand me here.  We love the people in that congregation.  They were well-meaning and it wasn’t that we had no fellowship at all.  However, we became aware that the structure we were part of did not lend to the depth of relationship we saw modeled in the New Testament– the depth that we yearned for.

Sharing Each Other’s Burdens

Paul told the believers in Galatia, “Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ” (Gal. 6:2).  Realistically, how can you share each other’s burdens when your church gatherings have a predetermined agenda?  How can you foster a deep relationship with someone during the greeting time?  How can you encounter God with others in a personal and natural way during the week when your calendar is already full with church events?  I realize that I’m speaking in extremes, but it’s in order to make a point.

Fellowship with believers should have depth to it.  It takes time, energy, and tears to manifest this type of community.   That’s why the most common description for the people of God in the New Testament is a family.  We are to be a family, sharing mutual love and trust with one another.  However,  I’m not going to share my struggles with someone that I cannot trust; and trust is not fostered in a ten-minute coffee break before a service.

The Beginning of the End

All these thoughts were swirling around within.  Countless times we went to Father, asking for wisdom and clarity.  I had always been told in Bible College that you need to press through discontentment in ministry. It sounded like a good principle back then,  but now I was in the thick of the struggle and very much struggling to maintain my composure.

Again, we went to Father and asked for closure. We wanted to resolve this unsettled issue and get back to the “work of the ministry.” However, the splinter remained. We both sensed that a transition was on the horizon, but Father only gave us enough insight to keep us in a place of dependence on Him (with a healthy dose of discomfort).

It was during that time that I came across a book entitled, Pagan Christianity?, by Frank Viola and George Barna.  In it, they examine the most common church traits of Christianity today and trace them back to their origins.  As I read through the book, I was astonished at how little of modern-day Christianity is scripturally-based and modeled on the 1st century New Testament church.  That book was a milestone for me, which I fondly refer to as, “The Beginning of the End.”

Stay tuned for more of the story!  Still to come:

• Does the modern-day pastor exist in the New Testament?
• What about spiritual authority and the “spiritual covering” movement?
• How did the early church gather and how is it different from today?
• How to leave your church without “throwing spears”
• How to know when it’s the right time to leave?
• How to walk with integry when leaving the institutional church?

Continue to Part 2: “Down the Rabbit’s Hole”

On my way to work last Thursday, I noticed a new billboard on Highway 494.  In the 5:00 o’clock pre-dawn darkness the orange and blues shouted a message to passersby: “Windows – Life Without Walls.”

I am a Mac enthusiast.  Therefore, I’m naturally pre-disposed to a critical attitude when it comes to Microsoft Windows.  However, the advertising slogan that Microsoft used is worthy of some honest criticism.

“Windows – Life Without Walls.”  Think about the windows in your home or office.  They provide light from the outside world, protection from cold Minnesota winters, and mild entertainment when the occasional bird flies into it.  Windows themselves are actually very useful.

However, a window by itself won’t do.  A garage-full of windows does not benefit anyone.  In order to take an otherwise useless piece of glass and metal and put it to use it must be installed in a wall.  Only once it is hung on a structure does it fulfill its role. Structure is a necessity.

When I talk to people about my experience leaving the institutional church, most people falsely assume that it involves a religious-flavored version of anarchy.  Images of wandering individuals and purposeless gatherings flicker through my mind.  They assume that I am living “life without walls.”

Why is it that leaving the four walls of tradition conjure up visions of reckless free-for-all’s?

Truth be told, leaving the institutional church does not require a departure from order. I’m still on my journey into the realm of organic Christianity, but here are some key points that I understand thus far.

Structure is Vital to a Healthy Life

I like the word “organic” because it implies something that is living.  The trees outside my window have life within themselves.  The Canadian geese waddling around the frozen lake have life within themselves.  Anything that is living is organic in nature.

The human body is comprised of 50-75 trillion cells.  These cells are organized in varying patterns and functions that result in arms, lungs, eyes, etc.  That means I am an extremely complex, organic creature!

The human body also has 206 bones.  These bones provide a framework that supports my organic body.  If these bones were missing, I would be nothing more than a blob of tissue.  Not having a framework to hold my brain, heart, or lungs in place would result in death.

Structure sustains and protects life.  Participating in an organic church setting requires structure in order to promote healthy function.

For instance, we had a handful of people over to our home last Friday night.  We shared a meal, drank coffee, and talked about our experiences with God.  It was unscripted and life flowed naturally from our conversations.  However, it required someone to organize the gathering by inviting people, cooking food, and making the guests feel welcomed.  (Shameless plug here: My wife is excellent at this!) My wife provided a context for people to gather together and share life.

We’ll look at the concept of organic leadership in a future post.  However, it is important to know that it does exist.  Structure can actually be very beneficial when it operates in a healthy way.

Organic Structure Is Not Predictable

During my brother’s generation, they had this novelty called a pet rock.  The first Pet Rocks were ordinary gray stones bought at a builder’s supply store and marketed as if they were live pets. The fad lasted about six months, ending with the Christmas season in December 1975.

If I took a pet rock and set it on my office table, I can  reasonably guarantee it would be there the next day.  It would be predictable.

However, if I had a pet dog and I put him on my office table, I could make no guarantee that he would be in that same spot the next day.  He may have wandered into the bathroom only to be caught drinking water from the toilet bowl.  His demeanor may have changed.  His energy level may be different.  His living, organic nature, makes him an unpredictable companion to the pet rock still sitting on my office table.

In an institutional church format, one could reasonably predict a gathering of believers.  Any given church building would probably be occupied on Sunday morning, between the hours of 9AM and 12PM.  There would most likely be a service led by professional clergy, introduced with a musical number.  Towards the end of the event, there would probably be a single person delivering a speech that was religious in nature.  Chances are, that speech would have three points, and be followed by a congregational prayer.  One week later, the entire process would most likely reoccur like clockwork.

Organic church, on the other hand, is spontaneous and unpredictable.  Last night, when we met with other believers, we ate dinner and spent most of the time sharing about how we encountered Jesus in the past few weeks.  The next time we gather, however, it may be on a different day, at a different time, and at another home.  Instead of talking the entire time, we may pray or worship.  We might decide to take a trip to the grocery store and buy a cartload of groceries for the family in need next door.  Each meeting has a mystery to it.

If something has life within it, that life will constantly take on different forms.

Organic Structures Grow Naturally

Staying with the illustration of the human body, notice how the skeleton structure changes over time.  A newly conceived baby, still in its embryonic stage, has no pronounced skeletal system.  At five weeks, the neural tube begins to develop, which will one day become the baby’s brain, spinal cord, nerves, and backbone.  The structure is simple and accommodates the present needs of that child.

Twenty years later, that child has been born and matured.  He is now a fully developed human being.  Instead of one neural tube, he has 206 carefully fashioned bones, each contributing to the overall support his body requires.  Structure naturally formed within this human being.  As he grew in maturity, the structure also grew and conformed.

If you are interested in launching out into organic Christianity don’t get bogged down with trying to figure everything out immediately before you begin.  Start small with what organic elements you have.  Let the organic structure naturally grow over time.  You do not need to designate “elders” and “deacons” right away, if at all.  You do not need to set agendas to the meetings.  Seek Father together, in your group, for what His agenda is.  Since you’re seeking a vibrant, organic experience things may look different every time.  The important thing is to gather, love one another, and focus on Jesus.

Avoid the tendency to name the group, establish roles, and set rules.  Seek to make your gatherings as simple as possible.  Follow the method Jesus used.  The method is incredibly simple, highly relational, easy to duplicate, and centered on God.  The method is found in John 5:19 - “I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself. He does only what he sees the Father doing. Whatever the Father does, the Son also does.”

Here’s a good example to get started.  Invite your friends over to your house for a meal.  Either provide the food or have each person bring a dish.  Sit down around a big table and, as you eat, ask one another, “How have you encountered Jesus this week?”  You can also ask them, “Where are you on your journey with Jesus?”  Follow the ageless slogan that I’m beginning to appreciate, the KISS method (Keep It Simple, Stupid!).